Monday, July 16, 2007


I'm sorry that you're hurting so desperately right now. I know how painful the seconds, and minutes, and days can be, how long the nights are. I understand how very hard hanging on is, and how much courage it takes. I ask though that you hold onto one day at a time. Just one day, and slowly this despair will pass. The feelings you fear you're trapped in will serve their purpose, and then fade away. Difficult to imagine isn't it? Almost impossible to believe when every cell in your body it seems cries out in agony, desperately in need of comfort. When it feels like the only thing in the whole world that can touch your pain and banish it is beyond your grasp. And after all this time, the assurance that you will heal has become an empty, broken promise. Just let one tiny cell in your body continue to believe in the promise of healing. Just one. You can surrender every other cell to your despair. Just that one little cell of faith that you can heal and be whole again is enough to keep you going, is enough to lead you through the darkness. Although it can't banish your suffering, it can sustain you until the time comes for you to let your pain go. And the letting go can only occur in it's own time, as much as we would like to push the pain away forever.Hold on. Hold on to appreciate the beauty of the earth, to feel the songs of the birds in your heart, to learn and to teach, to laugh a genuine laugh, to dance on the beach, to rest peacefully, to experience contentment, to want to be no other place but in the here and now, to trust in yourself, and to trust your life. Hold on because it's worth the terrible waiting. Hold on because you are worthy. Hold on because the wisdom that will follow you out of this darkness will be a tremendous gift. Hold on because you have so much love and joy waiting to be experienced. Hold on because life is precious, even though it can bring terrible losses. Hold on because there is so much that you can't now imagine waiting ahead on your journey - a destiny that only you can fulfill. Hold on although your exhausted and your grasp is shaky, and you want more than anything to let go sometimes, hold on even though. Please hold on.So much in life can be difficult, even impossible to understand. I know, I know... So many of us have cried in despair, "why?" "why?" "why?," and still the answers and the comfort failed to show. Survival can be a long and lonely road, in spite of all those who've stumbled down the path before you. And it can be a treacherous, torturous journey - so easy to get lost, and yet impossible to avoid even one painful step.And the light, the light at the end of the dark tunnel for so long cannot be seen, although eventually you'll begin to feel its' warmth as you move forward. And forward you must move in order to get through the hell of remembering, of despair, of rage, of grief. Keep looking forward please. Rest if you must, doubt your ability to survive the journey if you have to, but never let go of the guide ropes, although when you close your fingers around them, your hands feel empty, they are there. Please trust me, they are there… When you're exhausted, when all you have to count on is a weakened, weary faith, hold on. When you think you want to die, hold on until you recognize that it's not death you seek, but for the pain to go away. Hold on, because this darkness will surely fade away. Hold on…Please hold on.


(¯`•._.•[Raaji]•._.•´¯) said...

you are pretty good with keeping an optimistic approach in rough times. This post reminds me of some of the terrible times I have been through and it has only been through holding on that I have been able to get over those horrifying memories.

Anonymous said...

Wow this is one of the most amazing things I've ever read. It brought tears to my eyes.

Anonymous said...

Sir it is impossible for you to imagine what this did for me.

Thank you

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Anonymous said...

Thank-you for posting something so exquisite. I am going through hell right now and no matter how hard I try, I still continue to feel that I cannot go on- the pain is so bad. What you wrote brought me a sense of great peace. I really do appreciate it. Thank- you.

Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

Thankyou so much Shamur.It is now,Friday,December,5th,2012.............................Its amazing how your blog found me today.....................though posted in,2007.Just heaaring another someone,encourage you who does not even know you.......while you may be walking through you darkest night seasons of encouraging enough.Shamar.......pain wares literally 1,000,000,000 different faces.....and each one of us have our own story to tell........but we relate as fellow,wounded warriors....of life,and love.But I love how you say.......''just hold on.....even if its just with one single cell in your body.'' That is so clarifying,very well said For awhjile. Now.I have been dealing with my own,hurts,and emotional and physical pain......and sometimes your holding on by a thread.....but the point is your still holding.For me......I know the someone who has been the friend who sticks closer than a brother,or Jesus."He says....I made you in my image.....your precious in my site......and God is always watching......trying to find a way to touch our lives.Just knowing there is someone bigger than you or I,who cares about us,even when we feel abandoned by comforting,and a start.Yes.....we all have to heal in our own time and,embrace it,